


shadows

by LemonYellow406



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Oneshot, TW: implied suicide attempt, tw:implied depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-08-27 11:43:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16701889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LemonYellow406/pseuds/LemonYellow406
Summary: Virgil had always been plagued with demons made of shadow which tortured and destroyed all of his happiness, gorging themselves on emotions stolen.





	shadows

Virgil shouts, awake, back slick with sweat, and his dark curly hair now wet and sticking to his forehead as he shakes with sobs.

  
He holds his knees to his chest as his body shakes with tears unshed, as the fear was coursing through his body too fast for it to do anything else except shake and shake.  
  
The monster from his dream felt so real, it's dark eyes like pits to Hell, it’s grinning mouth showing all of its wet, inky teeth in the darkness, it’s arms seeming to go on for miles as they stretched further and further, it’s hands about to grab him when he woke up. But it couldn’t be real. It was just...it was just a dream. But, in the corner of his room, Virgil could swear the monster laid there, awaiting him to feel safe to pounce once again.    
  
He wanted to go, to leave his room and run to his parents, who would hold and cuddle him. But, he could hear from so far away, the bickering of his parents, gradually getting louder and angrier by the minute. Maybe Virgil...didn’t need to be held. He was nine years old, too old to run to his parents because of a dumb nightmare.

Virgil laid back down, sticky, his thin hands grabbing fistfuls of his blankets fabric and pulling it over every inch of his body, covering the tips of his toes to the top of his head. If he hid himself well enough, Virgil thought to himself, the monsters won’t see him and they'll leave.  
  


* * *

  
He slowly fell back asleep, terror still seeped into his very bones, falling asleep to the quiet arguing a few doors away. 

“Mama, I...there’s monsters in my closet!”  
  
His mother stops in her tracks and turns to Virgil, a tired smile on her lips.  
  
“My dear, you’re a bit old for this. If you want me to stay longer, I could just do that,“ Virgil’s mother says, walking back into the room.  
  
“No! No…” Virgil said loudly, the second almost a whisper on his lips.

  
"Dear, if not, you are much too old to make up lies like this. You never even made them while other kids were. Tell me the truth, Virgil. Why are you saying there are monsters?"  
  
"Because there are! I mean is! The monsters come when you leave! they look like shadows and they try to hurt me!"  
  
She looked at Virgil, expression unchanging.  
  
"Virgil. I'm going to go to bed, and tomorrow, you better tell me the truth."  
  
"But this is the truth! They're hiding behind the doors! I swear, Mama!"  
  
Her eyebrow raises, and she opens the closet door, seeing...nothing. She looks back to Virgil without a word and walks out of the room, the once calm energy around her now tense with annoyance and cold frustration.  
  
A deafeningly loud noise thundered through Virgil's head, the grinning face of the monsters, growing closer with every moment. Virgil tried to scream for his mother, but the monsters seemed to suck all of the air out of his mouth, registering him mute for them to do their terrifying tricks.

* * *

  
The monsters returned randomly for the following three years, could be every day for a week or once every few months, but they always returned, lingering in the corners of his room, of his sight, of his life.  
  
Virgil had finally believed they had left him alone after they disappeared for months and months on end and the fear that had become a constant in his life had dissipated to almost nothing, and he was finally starting to fear happy with reason, a feeling he hadn't felt since the monsters made of shadows began to appear.  
  
Unfortunately, things can't always stay the same.  
  
He arguments had grown larger and larger from small incidents. While before his parents would never even think of arguing in front of their son, now it felt like a constant background noise in Virgil’s life.  
  
The day his parents announced that they were getting a divorce, it didn't feel out of place, but oh God, was Virgil unprepared. His mother held his hands as the words poured from her lips. Virgil’s body froze, and the monsters seemed to pour from the walls, grinning with teeth of shadows and eyes that were like black holes in space, sucking up any piece of light it can find.

* * *

  
The monsters began to appear every single night after that conversation.

Virgil was numb to the world. The shadow demons had, every night, taught him how absolutely worthless he was, how much he deserved pain, how he was the reason for his parents' split and the hurt they went through each and every night. The demon's relished in it, excited that it poured out of him like water through a hose.  
  
His mother tried over and over for him to open ui0p to her but he refused, as whenever, he'd tell her about the demons, she'd just ignore him and tell him that he's faking, they're just lies, he's just looking for attention. Eventually, he began to believe her.  
  
His father never visited him or even acknowledged his existence. Virgil was hurt the first times he didn't return his calls or his attempts of communication, but after two years, he had to get eventually just accept it. His father had a whole new life now, a whole new life happier. Happier without Virgil.  
  
The shadows fed on that pain like they were at a buffet, gorging themselves until they cannot stomach anymore, but continuing to feed anyway.  
  
He felt empty, empty of happiness, of any emotion really. Any and every emotion he had, the shadow monsters would consume, replacing it with nothingness, and the empty feeling became his normal. Any emotion he'd have that wasn't sad or depressed surprised him until the monsters took it away. He hadn't felt happiness without reason since he was twelve years old. Now, at fifteen, Virgil could feel the demons planning something.  
  
Every day was on a loop, loneliness repeated for every second of the day. He felt like he was repeatably being slapped with pain and the tears would come at random times. He couldn't keep anyone around him for long enough to open up since  they'd believe he didn't care about them even though he cared so extremely much, he was just never able to show it since if he ever did, the demons would grow angry, hitting him with pain even harder when he arrived home.  
  
He had no one. No one who believed him, no one who could save him.

* * *

 

He had locked himself in his room, his knees held close to his face, his dark curls bouncing as he crashed to his knees. The bellowing laughter of the monsters surrounded Virgil, his body so accustomed to it that he didn't even flinch. His chin hit his chest as he felt his monsters consume the infinitesimally small amount of happiness he had left. They were becoming greedy, they wanted more. But, for him to gain more emotions and happiness, they'd have to leave. And they didn't want to do that.  
  
"Just get it over with," Virgil muttered under his breath, wrapping his thin arms around his middle.  
  
The monsters' heads swiveled towards Virgil, eyes glowing with pure anger.  
  
Virgil looked up, scared for just a millisecond before returning to annoyed indifference.  
  
The shadows began to close in on Virgil, and his head rose in a frustrated anger, shouting out, "I don't care! Just do it! Make me feel like shit again! I don't care! Don't matter! Just kill me already!"  
  
As the last words fell from his lips, the demons seemed to smile in glee, like a child on Christmas.  
  
It seemed the shadow monsters liked the idea of his death. His empty shell couldn't fulfill them anymore, but the soul of a human could leave them full for years.  
  
They began to surround him even closer, and for the first time in years, Virgil felt real fear. He didn't want to die, and so he stood up to the shadows.  
  
"No! I don't-I don't want this! Get away from me! I want to live!"  
  
Virgil sprinted away from the wall the monsters had cornered him in, wincing in fear, his hands pushing out in front of him, awaiting the coldness of the shadows overtaking him.  
  
It never came.  
  
After fifteen seconds, his eye creaked open, and for the first time since he as nine, they were gone.  
  
Well, gone from his vision but not from his soul. Sticking to his soul were some, but the amount was much smaller than before.  
  
Virgil was free. Free for the first time since childhood.

* * *

 

The shadows had left Virgil. He could laugh without reason, get angry and understand why he was, he could connect with others.  
  
His mother never knew his life for so many years, the pain that plagued him day and night, and his father doesn't want to ever know,  but that's alright in Virgil's mind, since all that matters is that he can be happy again.

**Author's Note:**

> Heyo, everybody!
> 
> So, fun fact: This was actually written for my creative writing class where we had to write any short story, and so I wrote this! 
> 
> I know I haven't written for a while and I hope to change that, but I haven't been feeling inspired to write lately. Like I started NaNoWriMo and gave up in the first week since I couldn't get inspired.
> 
> However, I have over twenty wips that I want to finish, and I hope that some will get to you guys by the end of the year.
> 
> -Lemon


End file.
